RANTING...
So, it's Spring Break. ?I have two kids, with about 5 years between them. ?I took the week off, to spend some time with the kids. ?BOTH of my neighbors with kids the oldest one's age, decide to TRY to dump their kids on me! ?
The first neighbor, single mother, says, "Oh, I have a new project. ?I've never left (girl) alone, but I have to. ?Would you mind if she had your phone number? ?Could you check in with her? Oh, you know how much your and my kid like to play, and my kid isn'ta problem . . . . " ?This same neighbor stiffed our neighborhood piano teacher last week. ?No, the neighbor isn't poor by any means. ?I had a good excuse why our house couldn't watch her kid the first day. ?We were going on a mini-day family vacation and the girl could not go do to the tour being booked. ?Like magic, the neighbor then paid another neighbor to watch the girl for the week! ?Problem #1 solved! ?Got to outsmart these other parents!
The second neighbor, single mother, says, "Oh, I have to go show homes and have alot of clients. ?Can my child play with your oldest child for 2 hours?" ?Well, 2 hours has turned into a sleepover for 3 of the past 5 days with non-stop play during each of the 5 nights! (except for the day when we went on a tour and I wasn't taking anyone else). ? ?Last night the second neighbor stops by and I was completely frustrated as the 3 kids were fighting/bickering for the past few hours. ?I saiid, ?"I've had enough of the kids. ?Two is company, three is a crowd. ?The three are bickering non-stop while you were gone. ?Take both your and my kid for the night" ?Thankfully, she did.
I wanted to take the kids to the roller rink, take the kids to the beach, take the kids to the water park, etc. ?But, I have to "do it" with the other kids in tow? ?That's not fair to me! ?And, of course, the other parents can't be bothered to offer to take thier kids or to go along with me!
This is why I have to put my kids in summer camp. ?If I don't, I am the neighbor who gets ALL the other kids in the neighborhood. ?And, it doesn't last for a day . . . it turns into 24/7. ?I've tried to put my foot down, but like roaches, they keep coming back.?
Last night I had peace. ?My little one was so worn out, he was asleep by 7:00. ?He's still asleep! ?The oldest was over at neighbor #2. AHHHHHH!
Any advice? ?Is getting dumped on part of my JW-raised personality? ?Am I setting myself up to be a martyr, and then complaining when I get trampled on??
Anwyay, I foudn this other website on "really bad parenting"! ?it actually gives bad parents advice . . .?
http://www.reallybadparentingadvice.com/rule-76-dump-your-kids-on-other-parents/
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July 15, 2010?By??
So wait, how long did your parents say they'd be out of town?
So, you have this sweet opportunity to attend a semi-nude Renaissance Festival in upstate New York where a couple of dudes from Phish (including the back-up drummer) are playing on Saturday night.
The tickets are cheap, the timing is right (the kids are only playing four soccer games on Saturday instead of six), and you can almost smell the booze/urine/body odor cocktail you?ll be inhaling all weekend.
Only problem: What to do with your children?
They?ve worn out their welcome with the in-laws, especially after the unfortunate incident with the nacho cheese and the Citronella candle. Which means that your best option is to dump your children on other unsuspecting parents.
It?s not as hard as it sounds. In fact, with a little bravado, it?s pretty damn easy.
However, the art of short-term dumping shouldn?t be taken lightly, as it requires the skills of a break-up artist combined with the nuanced, preachy love of Dr. Phil after several Red Bulls.
These two approaches never fail:
The can-you-drive-my-kid-home-from-a-game routine:?It?s fairly simple, as long as you can try not to look your friend Pete in the eyes.
?Hey, Pete, man, I need a favor. I have somewhere to go tomorrow, so would you give Brandon a ride home from his soccer game? Better yet, can he just hang out with you guys after the game for a few hours? Actually, make that something like eight hours. Well, come to think of it?maybe 48 hours. Did I say 48? I meant 72. Pete, man, I really appreciate this. Here?s five bucks to keep him fed while you have him. You can just give me the change when I get back.?
The extended sleepover routine:?Another easy one.
?Hey, Brenda, listen?would it be OK if Jenny sleeps over at your house tonight? She said that she and your little Monica already kind of planned it in school today. Oh, really? Monica has mono and head lice and hasn?t been at school for a week? That?s odd. I wonder why Jenny would lie to me? Anyway, it?s no big deal if Jenny is exposed to mono and lice?I mean, she?s gotta catch that shit sometime, right? I?ll bring her over now?and, um, it would be great to build up her immunity, I?ll just have her hang out with you guys all weekend, cool??
And just like that, you?re on a cheap shuttle to Albany, where pretend pirates and peasant wenches wear nothing but pantaloons as they jig to the exotic staccato of a drummer who dumped his kids at his parents? house.
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Source: http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/223101/1
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